A Custody Battle: The Third and Fourth Time Mediating

                                                                                                                                    1/14/15



I never intended this blog to cover my case as detailed as I have been, but I am hoping it does help others realize they are not alone in their struggles. Also, I hope to provide insight to the whole process and the different feelings, situations, outcomes, details and other important stuff that pertains to different custody cases, in the effort to try and help others. At this point my lawyer has rejected the other lawyers claims with a dismissal and we have been ordered to mediation. This is actually the fourth time I am going to mediation, but the courts might only know about three times because the other party walked away from the bargaining table before there was any real agreement to take back to the judge on one of the occasions.



 Before this time of mediation, I was instructed that I needed to attend the C.O.P.E. class at the YMCA again which cost $60 every time you take it and I have now found out is required more than once for many people. Also, court mediation orientation was also scheduled again to watch videos that I have already seen. Both C.O.P.E. class and the mediation orientation videos are very outdated in my opinion since they appear to be made in the 1980's or 1990's which I am surprised with all the ease at which they could make a new video or probably obtain new material. Certainly with the changes to families, certain things are good to mention and are not being mentioned in those videos, like the use of cell phones or emails as communication between parents and children.


This time around the other parent was not at the mediation orientation which I questioned and was told sometimes there separate times given. I was advised to contact the mediator within 3 days which I did. The mediation began and ended quickly with the other parent not wanting to fully negotiate and making the same requests for what was rejected with the lawyer's dismissal.  

Close to Christmas, I find out the other the other parent's lawyer is stating the other parent doesn't need to go to mediation orientation which I don't think is going to fly with the judge. Since then, the other parent has been instructed to go to a new appointment for oreintation due to missing the first appointment. Basically, if one parent goes, you need to go too. Both parents need to show they can follow rules and it helps in knowing they both had the same information presented to them to help move the case along in a balanced format.